Honey Chilli Potatoes

Hello, boys and girls,

Welcome to cooking with Varun! After his initiation with the infamous hen do, our favourite intrepid hero, like most other heroes, continued to do heroic things. Things like talking to pretty girls in bars without shaking, doing shots with strangers, laughing off drunken racial slurs, saving the world from alien invasions.. okay, maybe not that last one, but you get the point. What our hero did not think would happen, was be hit on. By guys. And grandmothers.

One time, while out with his posse at his favourite bar in Belfast, our champion felt the brush of a hand around his left buttock. The bar was crowded to the gills, so putting it down to an accident, he continued to sip his beer, until the touch began to tighten and metamorphosed into what can only be described as a full blown bum squeeze. Unaccustomed to being the subject of such an act, our protagonist whirled around to face his groper, only to find himself face to face with a (potential) grandmother who was sporting a broad grin on her kind face and a twinkle in her eyes, as she and her friends giggled at his gormless expression. Red-faced, he forced a laugh, raised his bottle and skulked away to the darkest corner he could find, and stood there with his posterior planted firmly against the wall. Another time, at a different club, he was approached by a bloke and offered a drink which he, while flattered, politely declined, and proceeded to find another corner to plant his rear end on, albeit this time for a different reason. Several attempted woos and invitations later, at an Oriental restaurant in Poona, India, where while in the loo, our gallant leading man was asked, 'Are you the model?' by a very camp young man. Being a seasoned campaigner at this point, he merely replied, 'No. But thank you for thinking that I was.' (hair toss), and walked back to his table to rejoin his friends and aid in their attempt at making a dent into the enormous amount of food that had been ordered.

Today's recipe is for one of the dishes from that night (so my sources tell me) and is easier to make than it is for me to successfully execute a hair toss without giving myself whiplash.

For my Honey Chilli Potatoes, you will need the following:

Potatoes	2-3 medium
Cornflour	1/2 tbsp
Chilli powder/flakes Garlic powder	2 tsp 1-2 tsp
Sriracha sauce	few big squirts to taste (or chilli sauce + garlic)
Honey Soya sauce Vinegar	few big squirts to taste  splash splash
Sesame seeds	2-3 tsp
Spring onion greens	handful
Salt	to taste
Oil

Prep:

1. Peel and cut the potatoes into chips.
2. Grab a bowl.
3. Toss in the potatoes.
4. Sprinkle on the cornflour.
5. Sprinkle on the chilli powder/flakes.
6. Shake on the garlic powder.
7. Mix.
8. Cut up the spring onion greens.

Method:

1. Deep fry or bake the potatoes until crisp.
2. Bung a pan on.
3. Splash in some oil.
4. Squirt in some sriracha.
5. Squirt in some honey.
6. Splash in the soya sauce and vinegar.
7. Mix.
8. Cook for a minute.
9. Toss the potatoes in.
10. Mix well until the potatoes are well coated.
11. Garnish with sesame seeds and spring onion greens.
12. Serve.
13. Stuff face.
14. Bask in the glory of your successfully executed dish.

Tip: You can swap out the cornflour with regular flour. Just make sure to only add just enough to lightly coat the chips. A thick coating will taste raw.

And remember, overeating is a myth. A full tummy is a happy tummy.