Pav Bhaji

Hello, boys and girls!

Welcome to cooking with Varun. Back in 2001-02, when I was in junior college, I was part of a fairly large group of people (the same group that put up 'Missing Person' posters in the Stuffed Capsicum recipe), and from time to time, as we'd make new friends, the group would get bigger. One such friend was, Boy Genius. Although he was already friends with a bunch of guys in my group on account of having been in the same school as them, he gained notoriety (or so I like to tell him) for being my doppelganger. While this isn't entirely accurate, it is true that early one morning when I ran into a classmate, Used-to-shed-on-my-jacket, she was rather surprised, and swore that she had just seen me enter a room on the opposite end of the corridor. As we watched the doorway of the room in question, Boy Genius walked out, oblivious to the confusion he had called. I can't really fault Used-to-shed-on-my-jacket though; Boy Genius and I were both skinny, 5 feet tall, dark, with big hair, and nerdy glasses. That was where the similarity ended though. As his name suggests, he was (and still is) much smarter than I, and incredibly kind, to the point that I'd call him and he would help me solve Trigonometry and Calculus problems over the phone.

As time passed, several of our number, who were aspiring to get into IIT, formed a clique, and would eat, sleep, and talk only about class, courses, and exams. Since we were fooling around a little less as a group than we used to, the few of us who didn't have the same goal formed a little clique of our own; in particular, Boy Genius, Michael Jordan Lover, Soft Spoken Bloke, and myself. We'd usually hang out on the college grounds, or at the eateries in the vicinity, and on more than a few occasions, we ended up going to Boy Genius' house since it was quite close. Visits to his house were generally eventful; we once, signed a mutual friend up with an 'alternate' email ID and sent love letters to a girl he fancied, Michael Jordan Lover and I attempted to download Pamela Anderson's sex tape on an internet connection slower than my grandmother before her knee replacement before Boy Genius saw what we were doing and stopped us, and at a particularly evil moment, cranked the volume up on Javed Jaffery's hit song, 'Mumbhai', at the exact moment when he cusses. That last one was when his mum was in the living room entertaining guests.. so umm.. yeah. Most visits to his house though, would end with us shamelessly shovelling copious amounts of pav bhaji his mum had made, and then going home and explaining to our own mothers why we weren't hungry. (And then obviously feeling hungry 12 seconds later.)

This recipe, therefore, is in honour of all the pav bhaji that Boy Genius' mum fed us! (And still does whenever I ask!)

For my Pav Bhaji, you will need the following:

Onions	1 large (and some for the garnish)
Potatoes	3-4
Tomato	1 large
Peas	1 cup
Capsicum (green pepper)	1
Red chilli powder	2-3 tsp
Pav bhaji masala	2-3 tsp
Tomato puree	big squirt (mostly for colour)
Salt	to taste
Oil

Prep:

1. Peel and boil the potatoes. (Or boil and peel. Whatever floats your boat.)
2. Boil the peas.
3. Roughly mash the potatoes and peas.
4. Cut the capsicum into small cubes.
5. Finely chop the onions.
6. Finely chop the tomatoes.

Method: 

1. Turn on the gas.
2. Bung a pan on.
3. Splash in some oil.
4. Count to 20.
5. Slide in the onions.
6. Cook until the onions become translucent.
7. Toss in the tomato.
8. Squirt in the puree.
9. Mix.
10. Sprinkle on the red chilli powder.
11. Sprinkle on the pav bhaji masala.
12. Pop in the capsicum.
13. Mix.
14. Cook for a few minutes.
15. Plop in the mashed potatoes and peas.
16. Pinch on salt to taste.
17. Splash in a cup of water.
18. Mix.
19. Bring the mixture to a simmer and cook until it reaches the desired consistency. (I like mine to be a mucky consistency like a football field after the rain.)
20. Do a little taste test for the salt. You can add some more pav bhaji masala as it's simmering if you want a stronger flavour.
21. Garnish with chopped onions, big squeeze of lemon juice, and chopped coriander leaves.
22. Serve with generously buttered and warmed pav.
23. Stuff face.
24. Bask in the glory of your successfully executed dish.

Tip: If you're big on veggies, feel free to boil and throw in some cauliflower and carrots. I wouldn't, but who am I to stop you?

And remember, overeating is a myth. A fully tummy is a happy tummy!